when you feel like you want to punch your face with your hand. When you feel like you're being reprimanded too harsh. That feeling when you're talking with yourself, and yourself say:
"Nay, segini aja nih usahanya? Segini doang? Terima jadi doang? Ga haus ilmu Nay? Ga mau nambah lagi? Yakin? Mimpi aja sana mau masuk fakultas ini-itu, universitas ini-itu. Mimpi. Get real! Ibarat kata lo mau terbang tapi prepare dan berbagai cara untuk membuat sayapnya aja ga ada. Lo cuma berharap punya sayap tapi ga ada usaha. Lo cuma mimpi. If you want to reach something, start to make every possibilities to reach your dream. Start to open every way. It is better to have so many possibilities than have nothing. Stop pretending like you're the only one who want to get what you want to be. Stop acting like you're smart enough to reach your dream. You're nothing. You have nothing to prove. Start open-minded. You should. You have to. And I believe in you, Nay. Let's fight!"
Then, Ah. I'm craving for science. I really am.